Can This be Happening to Me?
by The Iron Butterfly
Summary: A Clarisse & Joseph story. An unknown feeling, boiling desire...
1. Chapter 1

To Katrina,

Because I promised…

Can This be Happening to Me?

A Clarisse & Joseph story

Joseph was lying on his bed, still dressed, looking at the ceiling, thinking at that quite rough day. His thoughts went toward Clarisse, although he tried to pull himself together, for she was after all Queen and he have been made head of security a few years ago, before King Rupert (King Rupert may rest in peace) has been hit with illness. Thinking how could she stay perfectly calm while all those men composing the parliament did throw knives at her for a project she did put together for quite a long time ago. Yet she didn't let them know just how much she was boiling inside at the mention of the future of the monarchy in Genovia; Clarisse had lost Philippe, who was the crown prince. It was he who was to take her place as King; the bloodline had reached its end. Joseph was breathing deeply, slowly drifting away in another world. Slowly closing his eyes but opening them repeatedly, he decided that perhaps he should take a quick shower and tuck himself under the sheets, drifting away as he would think about what he could do to help the cause. He certainly wouldn't want the Van Tucken to rule that country, for Genovia to stop being as glorious as it is today.

_Amelia Mignonette Thermopolis Renaldi, Princess of Genovia…_

He got straight up, got his thoughts together, put his robe on and ran downstairs. Given the time it was, nobody was up except the night shift people. He opened the door leading to the staff's office, sat and immediately opened the computer, reaching out his hand to grab a book in the library, containing the family history. What was the fuss all about? It strokes his mind like a light; Philippe did have a girl with the woman he frequented for many years before accepting his role in Genovia. Where was that girl now? He must find her; she would be Clarisse's only hope of keeping the bloodline in her favor. He had to do quick so he could take care of everything during the day to come. He did call Charlotte on the phone, waking her up.

"Join me in the office NOW!" he almost yelled, but restrained himself, considering the time of the night.

"What's going on Joseph?" she asked, her voice being in hush tone.

"No question, just do as I ask you, please, hurry!" He hung up, looking at the computer again. In no time, there was a soft knock on the door.

"Come on in Charlotte." he calmly said, although he would have been tempted to run to the door, letting her enter and rush everything that went through his mind since he'd awoken. He calmly but excitedly showed her the computer screen.

"Where is she now Joseph?" Charlotte asked, a broad smile forming on her lips.

"She would be in San Francisco. There's not much time Charlotte. Let's go and find her!" clearly he was excited. He also thought that it could do Clarisse some good to see family. Since when did he get his attention at what would make her Majesty happy? Since when did he care that much? It wasn't only because of the Van Tucken wanting to run the country again, but couldn't think about where that sudden attention toward the Queen could possibly come from.

"No time for that right now…" he thought to himself, shaking his head.

"Joseph, it's 2 in the morning. I can't call and wake her Majesty at this hour!" she answered him.

"It's only 6pm in San Francisco you know. We could travel by night, less people in the airport!"

"She'd kill me for listening to you; I'll get fired!"

She thought for a second, but didn't have the time to think clearly as Joseph gently shook her arm, getting her to move and wake everybody, her Majesty first.

"Do you know what time it is Charlotte?" the Queen quietly spoke, placing her messed up hair as she's just awoken by the call.

"I'm sorry your Majesty. There would be something of major importance to be discussed as soon as possible. Ouch! now". Joseph had pinched her, getting her to convince her Majesty she'd have to come downstairs right away so they could get to San Francisco before the end of the evening.

"I'm come come coming... aaaatchoum! I'm sorry."

"She's coming down Joseph!"

"GOOD!" he let that one out, as he didn't care since her Majesty herself was up.

"What would you think she'll do?" she asks him, as she's unable to think straight at this hour.

"You ask me Charlotte? How would I know? He answered, innocently.

"Well… you're mostly at her side all the time, so I… I… I thought…" Charlotte answered back.

"Never mind. I hear her coming." He announced to Charlotte as he got up from the chair, tying his robe tight not to let an ounce of flesh be visible.

"What is it?" Clarisse asked, sounding more rude that she intended to, which got two pair of eyes looking at her in a bit of shock. Realising how she's just talked to them, her eyes softened. Joseph and Charlotte sighted, the pressure of the moment cooling down.

"We've found her your Majesty!" Joseph said, being suddenly serious but still pretty excited by the idea.

"Found who Joseph?" She didn't understood what he was talking about, obviously.

"The Genovian crown's savior; His Highness Philippe's daughter Amelia!" He said to her with a smile in his voice.

Her jaw dropped open, a tear forming in her eyes but she had to hold it, keep it for when she would be alone. They mustn't suspect what the news gave to her hopes of keeping the monarchy in the Renaldi family. She nodded, simply, making Joseph and Charlotte exchange one look at each other.

"Would you want to contact her your Majesty?" Charlotte carefully asked.

"Where is she?" Clarisse asked as it has been about fifteen years she didn't had any news from this side of the family.

"Apparently she and her mother Helen are living in San Francisco, where Helen is exposing her art work." Joseph answered as quick as possible, using a tone that would make Clarisse understand that perhaps, she would have to cancel her appointments planned here for the rest of the week and take the plane to San Francisco.

Looking at Charlotte, she asks her when they will leave for the airport.

"In thirty minutes your Majesty. Shade is getting the necessary packed."

"Good Charlotte, thank you. I must get ready then! Let's meet in the grand hall in twenty minutes" She said as she turned around and almost ran back upstairs to get dressed and ready to leave.

They went to their respective rooms and got their suitcases ready. Joseph took a quick shower and took another look at his suitcase, making sure not to forget anything, especially not his poetry books nor his music. When would he find the time to read the book or listen to music anyway?

"This will be an interesting week!" He said to himself, turning off the lights of his room and walking toward the grand hall, his suitcase in his hand. He was the first to be ready "as usual" he thought, so he went directly to the car to help Shades charging, as Clarisse and Charlotte arrived in the hall, ready to leave as well. Shades, as well as Joseph, went to meet them and to take their luggage. Well, mostly Clarisse's luggage. The maids know the woman who rules their country…

"We're all there, let's not lose a minute!" Clarisse said quite abruptly as she went to the car and got inside, followed by Charlotte. After closing their door, Joseph took his seat beside Shades. They took off to the airport. During the ride, Charlotte has been occupied on the phone, calling everybody who had an appointment with her Majesty today. Clarisse was gathering her thoughts together as she looked outside, trying to find all the energy she could in the nature that was defiling in front of her. When they arrived at the airport, they had the many luggage transferred from the car to their private plane as Joseph, Charlotte and Clarisse almost ran to take their places aboard to take off immediately, flying toward San Francisco, for Clarisse to meet the heir to the throne of Genovia, the only heir! But first and foremost, meet her granddaughter, Amelia.

Joseph sat beside Charlotte, to discuss the plans, while Clarisse was in the back, thinking about the journey that had just begun.

"Would she already know about all this? I wouldn't think so, unless Helen did tell her. I most certainly hope not, we had an agreement didn't we? What if she wouldn't be ready to accept her place? Pull yourself together Clarisse, don't be silly." Clarisse said to herself. Yet, for the first time in her life, she was nervous, she must admit it. Clarisse thought she could be cold and somewhat distant about her feelings, she always has, she needed to be.

"Mrs. Helen Thermopolis?" Charlotte asked to the lady who answered the phone.

"Yes" did the lady answered, shortly, unsure if it was yet for another poll or some publicity which she isn't interested in.

"This is Charlotte from the Genovian attaché course…"

Silence could be heard at both ends for a few seconds, when Helen gathered herself and got to talk.

"How can I help you Charlotte?"

"It would be important that your daughter, Ms. Amelia Thermopolis joins us at the embassy as soon as possible; Wednesday afternoon. It is a matter of urgency actually!" on that last word Charlotte held her tongue. How could she intend it was something important? How could she be so unprofessional?

"I certainly will tell her Miss. May I ask what it's all about?" Helen asked, being curious has it concerned her 15-year-old daughter.

"I am sorry ma'am I do not have the liberty to answer." Charlotte felt proud of her answer although she did want to tell her, as she also does not want the Van Tucken to take over the throne of Genovia so it really is an emergency.

"Oh, sure. I will tell her. Thank you for calling." Helen answered shortly, wondering what could possibly been going on. After she hung up the phone, she felt her knees go week and needed to sit to gather her wits. Helen took a deep breath, got up and went to her room, looking for her picture box. Out of it, she looked at some pictures of Philippe she still had. How much did she love that man! He was gone now. Not gone, taken away. Yes he and Helen were divorced but it wasn't from unhappiness; Philippe had a decision to make, either to choose between his life with Helen and their newborn child or to take his mother's place on the throne of Genovia.

"It's planned then!" Joseph and Charlotte have both agree on the arrangements. Joseph got up and went to look for her Majesty, to inform her of the plan he and Charlotte did come up with. He found her asleep on her seat, her head facing toward the window. Without thinking, he grabbed the blanket that was by her said and covered her with it.

"What have I just done?" He thought to himself, starring at her. Her eyes closed, arms crossed; maybe was she looking for heat? "Am I not the head of security? Isn't it my job to look after her safety?" That thought reassured him as he left to go back to Charlotte.

"What did she think of it Joseph?" Charlotte enquired.

"I couldn't tell her, she had fallen asleep, so will I in a few minutes I feel." He answered, making himself comfortable in his seat.

"Maybe I should too. I think we're not far away from the airport."

"It'll be a demanding journey Charlotte… but an interesting one I guess."

"You're probably right Joseph. At least I hope you are!"

They landed in San Francisco a few hours later, when the sun has just awoken. A limousine was waiting for their arrival. They went into the vehicle after the luggage has been transferred again and off to the embassy they were. All together they could review the plan for this week and take some appointments with the other leaders she could talk with about some projects this week; Spain and Portugal. The project for a railroad joining the countries together for commercial matter was to be discussed. It would be good for the pear market in Genovia as they would be easier to export.

Clarisse immediately brushed her hand with her other, still feeling his slight touch. Clarisse glanced quickly at him, her eyes questioning the purpose of his gesture as the protective wall rose in her look. She was used to feel the closeness of his hand on her back when he lead her wherever she had to go, in order to make sure no one would get to her, but never had he even dare brush her hand, her flesh… She rushed her stare back at the pile of paperwork waiting for her.

Joseph felt her nervousness for what he had just dare do, although she did try to hide her confusion, and immediately turned around when he heard Charlotte approaching the office, to announce that Amelia has arrived. Hearing the news, Clarisse scolded her scarf and got up, took a quick glance at the pile of paper she didn't even touch and went to meet with her granddaughter to announce her that perhaps, her life will forever be changed.

"Amelia, I'm so delighted you could come" Clarisse said as she looked at the young woman standing in front of her. She looked at her, from her shoes to her head, remembering how she looked the last time she saw her, fifteen years ago. Her first thoughts wandered at how an incredible challenge it will be to make a princess of her Amelia. Clarisse thought perhaps she mustn't be too harsh on her already, considering she obviously isn't aware of the Genovian royal etiquette. "Nor etiquette either." Clarisse thought but shook her head, trying to get what she had just said about her granddaughter. Could she have been totally unfeeling by now? "Not the time to think about yourself Clarisse but about that young woman before you who is first and foremost your granddaughter!" she thought to herself. "But also the heir to the throne of your country…" she added.

"I don't want to be a princess!" Amelia shouted to the lady who called herself her grandmother but also the lady who had ignored her for the past fifteen years, until today. Deep down in her heart, Clarisse loved her very dearly. She was after all her son's daughter! "And the heir to the throne of your country…" That thought never did escape her mind. She hated to admit it, but… but… she needed help as she couldn't, all alone, make a princess of her. Yes she would give her books to read, teach her how to walk, talk, stand as a princess should. Yet it wasn't enough. She also needed to LOOK like a princess. Not that she thought the young woman wasn't charming. In fact, she thought that if little details were taken care of, Amelia would find a new confidence in herself she'd probably never felt before. But she ran away from the embassy… Poor little dear, she must be scared to death at what is needed from her.

"Will you help me?" Clarisse asked Joseph; for he was someone she knew she could trust entirely. Yet there was something about him that sheltered all the defensive barriers she did raise around herself. How does he do that? She wouldn't know, wouldn't want to know. Or does she?

"Oh…bother!" she thought, not knowing where it came from suddenly. Was she not Queen? Indeed she was. Clarisse was also a woman. The idea of her as a woman did escape her mind a little while ago.

Charlotte, Joseph and her Majesty had dinner together in the staff kitchen and discussed further what they will have to do to help Amelia; help her wake the princess inside her. Obviously there was something to be done about her look. Clarisse didn't really want to point it out given a respect for every human being but it couldn't do anything but help.

"Paolo!" Charlotte exclaimed, having four eyes focused on her. This name brought many funny memories to Clarisse, how he never knows when to stop kissing her hand, for one, which got Joseph angry. It wasn't his fault if kissing the monarch's hand was a sing of respect but yet there was something in the way he does it repeatedly. Fortunately, Clarisse takes her hand back as Joseph pushes Paolo aside.

Clarisse got up from the table, excused herself, although she seemed to enjoy that time being spent alone with them; time spent alone with him…

"Oh no you don't" She thought to herself, rushing toward her room. Joseph stayed where he was, watched her go away, trying to think at what could possibly be on her mind for her to excuse herself from the table when she barely had eaten the food on in her plate. He excused himself as well, leaving Charlotte alone.

He took a shower, took his book and sat in front of a warm blazing fire.

"_Nothing which we are to perceive in this world equals the power of your intense fragility: whose texture compels me with the colour of its countries, rendering death and forever with each breathing_

_I do not know what it is about you that closes and opens: only something in me understands…"_ Reading those words, dancing in his mind, Joseph immediately closed the book, for he didn't really want to believe how he could think about the person that was now invading his thoughts every time she was in his sight, every time he was behind watching her…

That time in the plane, when he put the blanket over her shoulder for her not to get cold, how he would have loved to lie at her side, brushing his fingers through her thin hair, Clarisse closing her eyes enjoying the moment, the sweet sensation in gives her.

"She couldn't think that way about you silly! You're just an employee. She's Queen, you're her head of security," He thought to himself before getting up and moving toward his bed, peeling the sheets so he can climb in and have a nice sleep.

_A soft moan escaped her mouth as he firmly crushed his lips against hers. It had been a few days since he hadn't seen her. To him, they have been apart for far too long, as childish as it would seem. He needed her he wanted her. Right here, right now. She did find the way to drive him to his limit. It showed in the way he was brushing his body against hers, getting even more excited. She did follow the rhythm he had settled. It wasn't time for boiling desire, asking desperate answers… Gods Clarisse wanted him as much as he did want her. She was almost screaming his name and yet he wasn't even inside her…_

When he woke up, he had been sweating. The memory of his dream shocked him.

"That's not the kind of thing she deserves. She deserves tenderness, sweetness. He went toward the bathroom to freshen up his face, looked at his reflection in the mirror, which made him smile. He went back to bed, trying to think what has been wrong with him these last days.

_Clarisse went toward him on the sofa and decided to lie down, resting her head on his lap. It wasn't her goal to disturb him from his lecture; she wanted to be with him, feel his embrace, smelling him, feeling content after that rough day. As she settled, he looked down at her, bent down and kissed her lips. Slowly Joseph parted and ran his hand through her thin hair, brushing her neck with his fingers, which made her shiver. She lifts her head up to capture his lips asking, needing more from him…_

That was enough! He got up and decided to have a walk outside in the garden. Joseph's pace stopped abruptly when he saw Clarisse sipping her eternal cup of tea by the French doors. His eyes widened, he felt his heartbeat quickened… He went to her but as Joseph went closer, Clarisse didn't move. Perhaps she was upset by something; he wouldn't know why but he knew by the way she was standing, the way her gaze seemed to be focus somewhere out of this world. Oh how he would like to discover that place!

She almost jumped when she realised someone was coming near her.

"Oh, Joseph! You scared me."

"I'm sorry your Majesty, it wasn't my attention at all." He said to her, reassuring her as she witnessed his smile. Yet there seems to be something in his eyes she's never noticed before, a smile she's never seen before.

"Joseph?"

"Your Majesty!" he raised his eyebrow, a questioning look in his eyes, wondering what she would say next.

"Could you please…" she didn't know if she could finish what she was about to ask him, feeling childish. "Oh Joseph! This is so ridiculous I feel like a schoolgirl." At that he grinned, a large smile appeared on his mouth.

"Whatever it is you ask your Majesty I shall say yes."

"Would you… would you… would please call me Clarisse?"

"Clarisse, your Majesty?" he answered back using a teasing tone, which made her blush. Never had he seen her blush before. Never had she blushed in front of him before.

She closed her eyes has she heard him say her name. She must pull herself together otherwise her blush would go deeper.

"Clarisse…" he said, almost whispering. He was quite enjoying the feeling of power it gave him, knowing that at this very moment, the vision he had in front of him wasn't the Queen but Clarisse.

He caught her gaze but Clarisse that it wouldn't be right to dive into his eyes, although she thought she would belong there. How would she know? How would he know?

"_I do not know what it is about you that closes and opens: only something in me understands…"_

The words were clearer to him now. The only thing he could do was to let the time go by. Hopefully, someday she would give it into him and from that moment he would enjoy the rest of his life with the woman that know occupies a place in his heart. He didn't want to search where this attraction came from but some day will come that he'll want to know where it could lead him, lead them.

Clarisse did ask Joseph to teach the traditional dance of Genovia to Amelia; it was almost a disaster as she did hurt Joseph unintentionally. It didn't take long after she's been excuse to run back home, leaving Joseph and Clarisse alone in the ballroom.

He stayed behind, resting his back against the column, observing her. He moved toward and presses the play button. She didn't understand what he would be doing. For a few seconds she didn't know what to think. His eyes did capture hers. She knew she wanted to enjoy being in his arms for a short moment. Ashe offered his hand to her, Clarisse's eyes softened. In a matter of millisecond, she went from being the Queen, Joseph's employer to plain simple Clarisse. He would be the only one to witness the expression that lights her face. Her, who was used to make speeches, she didn't dare break the ambiance saying anything. He spins her back in; he could have put his arms around her, never let her go. Perhaps it wasn't the moment. It was the moment to enjoy being with Clarisse. As they moved together on the dance floor, following the rhythm of the music, Clarisse inconsciently swayed her hips, at Joseph's delight.

As the music ended, they were both lost into each other's eyes. In the meanwhile, Charlotte came in the ballroom to give some information as how things were evolving, she found herself dumbfounded finding the Queen of Genovia and her head of security exchanging a gaze that spoke out loud. She backed up and decided that perhaps she should keep that to herself.

It was Clarisse who first broke the closed gap between them, her breathing came out uncontrolled. Joseph tried to search her eyes for an answer to his questions, his fears. Searching for some approval for his desires. He would have closed the gap between them, make her tightening her grasp as he would put his lips on hers in a gentle kiss but he was truthfully not daring to cross the line. "Not for the moment." He thought to himself. He watched her move back, return to the table where Clarisse left her belongings, picked them up and went away, in her office. She needed to be alone right now; she couldn't face him right now. Joseph went upstairs to his room to gather his wits and think for a minute at everything that had just happened.

The princess lessons with Amelia were progressing fast enough. She was becoming a princess. Clarisse always knew she had the heart of a princess, though Mia wouldn't have considered herself being of royal blood.

The State dinner was soon but Clarisse knew Amelia was ready. Even Joseph chipped in and helps her practice the entrance, as she will have to enter by herself. It would be different at the Independence Day ball, where she'd enter with the Queen. In spite of what happened during the State dinner, Mia did do well, Clarisse was proud of her.

Clarisse enquired her maid to draw her a bubble bath, for she needed to relax after that quite tiring evening. She excused her staff so she could undress by herself. At first they didn't understand what her Majesty asked but had the obligation to do as they were told and they left the Queen's chamber.

The fire was blazing, dancing in front of Clarisse's eyes as she gazed at the flames. Not dropping her glance at the fire, she brought her to her back, reaching the zip and gently brought it down. Her hands then rested on her shoulder, carefully pushing away the soft fabric of her dress, that by the weight of it dropped to the floor, revealing her slim figure. Nobody was there to see, except Joseph who waited at the door to come in, as he wanted to have a chat.

Feeling that he doesn't have the right to watch nor her Majesty, nor Clarisse undress, he turned his head around, arriving face to face with Charlotte.

"What are you doing?" asked Charlotte, uncertain of what to think of the moment.

"There was a technicality I wanted to discuss with her Majesty, if you mind." Answered Joseph, hoping it would make as much sense as it did in his mind then it would in hers. "Her Majesty is getting to… She's unavailable for the moment." He added, then bit his bottom lip, realising perhaps he might just have sold himself to Charlotte. Fortunately, for his sake, she apparently didn't pay too much attention and turned around and went back to her occupations. He didn't stay too long in front of the chamber's room and did as Charlotte and returned to his room.

As her foot entered in the water, it sent a shiver through her spine, making her escape a deep sigh. She rested her back against the installation and closed her eyes, breathing deeply, relaxing. Clarisse took a washing clothe, dipped in the hot water and crushed it above her shoulder, for the water to wave down on her back, which gave her goose bumps and making her feel the incredible sensation the hot water on her skin gave her. She tilted her head, enjoying the moment of pure relaxation, relief and most of all, abandon. Clarisse moved her hand down, lifting her leg up, massaging it with the soap, breathing the scent of the almond soap. She brought it back into the water and did the same procedure with her other leg. Her hand then went to her opposite arm, as she brushed the washing clothe from the top of her shoulder to her fingertips. After washing her other arm, she moved her hand toward her breast, closing her eyes as her thoughts drifted away… toward Joseph.

"Joseph?" she almost shouted, suddenly waking up from her daydream. Somehow, Clarisse felt neither feelings she's never experienced before, like nor her mind nor her body would belong to her anymore. Clarisse tried to find some answer, because there must be one somewhere, she thought. Her Majesty can't permit herself to lose it, au contraire, she must find it!

The search was exasperating. She searched in her memories of moments she remembered of her and Joseph. Clarisse suddenly felt secure mentioning his name. "Why is that?" she asked herself. She's used to find answers but she was now lost in her own thoughts. "Oh tush!"

She got out of the bath and put her long white silk nightgown and went straight to bed. It didn't take her long to fall asleep, the dinner had taken all of her energy, as it was all focused on Mia, making sure she was doing fine in that first experience for the young girl.

_Clarisse let her head fall back as Joseph pushed the swing for she can go higher, her hair flowing against the wind, caressing Joseph's face when she went backward toward him, making him laugh. Each swing she was inches away from him, he'd whisper words in Spanish in her ears, which made her smile broadly._

"_Oh, mi amor…"_

"_Usted es mi alma, mi piedra.."_

"_Duelo necesitarle.."_

"_Mi querido"_

"_Mi esposa"_

"_Te quiero, te quiero mi amor!"_

_That time, when the swing brought her back to him, he stopped her and delicately kissed her neck, which made her close her eyes, moving her head backward to give him better access…_

XI


	2. Chapter 2

This day promised to be a bright one, it smelt so in the air. The hot rays of the sun warmed her bare shoulders, lighting her face. Clarisse grinned, not daring to open her eyes just yet so the light would give her a headache. Instead, she stayed still, trying to convince herself how good it would be to stay in bed and read a book, waiting to be fully awaken and then go for a walk in the garden with Maurice running playfully around her.

"Your Majesty? Your Majesty?" a voice called in her direction. She was taken away from her reverie and realised that her reality was to go through paperwork all day long, having a small rest once in a while but she didn't have the luxury to let herself take time think about her; it always has been and always will be, she knew that. Clarisse had a duty to fulfill and she was devoting herself totally to the cause; being raised as royal meant never dare to "loose it", "we'd rather find it darling", her father has often said. Although she wouldn't admit it, she would live her life in a cottage she'd buy in the countryside, reading books in front of the lake, sipping tea, etc. Later in the afternoon she's go take a walk, picking up flowers on her way back home…

After a rough day, Clarisse was sitting in her private boudoir, finishing a small point, sipping tea and the television was on so she would witness her granddaughter's first "real" public appearance; Amelia told her grandmother she would appear on Lily's cable show. Clarisse did agree for it would be a nice way for Mia to break the ice with the press; breaking it in a proper way.

Until Mia would show up on the show, Lily had Maya with her, to entertain the audience with his eternally boring magic tricks. Lily didn't approve but he was her last option to keep the show going on since, obviously, Amelia seemed to be nowhere to be found.

Mia couldn't believe she was finally dancing with "him". What does that boy had so special that made Mia blushed every time he'd look at her? She didn't try to find the source of the excitement, the goose bumps she felt going through her body when he was in her sight. Yet he'd never laid an eye on her for she was a "nerd" compared to that "Backstreet Boy clone" as Helen, her mother, would say.

The song ended and they parted. Mia thought perhaps it would be the best time and place to make a move. He said himself he didn't like superficial people, people who could be tempted to do about just anything to get their 15-minute-glory.

"It's safe Mia, they're gone, let's go!" Josh said toward Mia. She immediately felt relived, as she wouldn't want to make the front page of the newspaper again…

"Just what did you think you were doing young lady? This isn't the way a princess should behave! After all I've thought you, after all the progress I thought you had reached… I guess you're making a right decision not to accept your role Mia. That will be all thank you!" Clarisse said to the woman that would have taken her place as Queen of Genovia. Amelia said nothing, didn't answer. She turned on her heels and left. Her grandmother was right; she didn't deserve to take the job. Not accepting her role was a wise decision…

"You may come in now!" Clarisse said, not lifting her head up to welcome her guest, Joseph, her head of security but also her right hand. She honestly didn't know how she could come up with some explication to tell the press. Perhaps she knew Joseph was right, that she has been a bit too harsh on her granddaughter, not daring to what Amelia would have wanted to say.

He noticed how her eyes softened when he told her that she has been harsh on her granddaughter. It told him she knew he was right.

"I have no doubts she can do this." Joseph said, nodding to accentuate his point.

"I thought so too!" Clarisse then replied, a smile forming on her lips. She was glad to have him by her side, as there was some times when even as a Queen, she would lose her track. She wouldn't admit it for he was perceived as strong in its entirety.

"Tell them what happened your Majesty, it's simple."

"Thank you Joseph! If you'll excuse me, I'll go and think about it all." Clarisse as she passed by him, heading toward her private quarters.

"Ladies and gentlemen, thank you for coming on a so short notice. The reason for this conference is to put everything in its place as there is a place for everything so everything at its place. My granddaughter Amelia…" Clarisse charmed them, talking about family values, being proud of who we are, how proud she was of her granddaughter. Yet, as a Queen, she couldn't forgive what happened for the moment, as everything was new for her too.

The rest of the day, everybody grew silent for no apparent reason thought her Majesty. She had done her job… Clarisse decided to have dinner in her suite perhaps; she felt the need to escape so she dives in one of her poetry book.

"_I don't know what it is about you that closes and opens; only something in me understands…"_

What is it with those words? Closing her book, Clarisse felt her cheeks redden… Instantly, she grabbed her cup of tea and went toward her balcony, for the beauty of the garden to lighten her thoughts, her mood.

Gripping the rail of the edge, her eyes widened momentarily and softened as soon as she recognised the black figure she saw strolling in her garden. Joseph… Clarisse never wanted to admit her soft side but at this very moment, she felt something she knew never existed in her being, as she would mention his name. She lost sight of him and was the first surprised to find that she was searching him with her eyes. After a few minutes, Clarisse gave up and took a sip of her tea that was getting cold.

"Searching for something your Majesty?" a voice said behind her, making her shiver. She would know that voice anywhere. Fearing to show any emotion she would have, she pulled herself straight. What was she doing?

"Oh no, no…" She seemed to hesitate, looked down at her cup of tea.

"That would be cold by now don't you think Clarisse?" Clarisse? Clarisse? He called her Clarisse? She tried to hide her blush but it was too late, he saw it.

"Yes, perhaps… could you bring me another one?" She asked rather coldly.

"Yes your Majesty…" He bowed and was heading out to get her a cup of tea. She stopped him.

"Joseph?"

"Your Majesty?" He turned around, a grin appeared on his face. His tone was rather soft, intimate. "For her only." He thought to himself.

"Was there something you wanted?" She asked him, secretly hoping that, turning around, he would run up to her and crush his lips against hers. Clarisse wouldn't protest…

"As a matter of fact…" he began, unsure himself of what to tell her next. Joseph would have loved to have the nerve to tell her his discovery about the feelings he would have toward her, telling her how he'd like to run his fingers through her thin hair, whisper tender words in her ears, do whatever she'd ask him to do…

"Yes?" she enquired, nodding for him to continue.

"A cup of tea coming." He simply said instead. Joseph couldn't help himself to notice her soft smile that faded to his words. He bowed and left, leaving a puzzled Clarisse

"What would have I told her anyway?" he thought, stopping his pace in the staircase. "You wouldn't deserve her, silly Joseph; she's the monarch, you're just her head of security. But you're also a man in love with a woman…" That thought made him smile. Perhaps, he should tell her at a more appropriate time.

Genovia had nearly lost its princess, for Amelia wanted to run away from all of it but a letter found from her father's diary made her change her mind all of the sudden; she had to get to the Genovian embassy for the Independence Day ball. In a way, Amelia reminded Clarisse of herself when she was about her age; how she would fight not to be fitted in some pattern, but she couldn't escape it because it was what she was meant to do of her life.

The evening went as planned and at Clarisse's great pride and joy (but relief first and foremost), Mia accepted to be forever more, Amelia Mignonette Thermopolis Renaldi, Princess of Genovia. Came her Majesty's other favorite part of the evening; the dance. They did begin the ball with a waltz, which Mia finally joined as Michael stepped in to offer his hand for the dance. Clarisse was dancing with her Prime Minister Motaz; but he wouldn't enjoy the chance of holding her Majesty in his arm too long, as Joseph soon approached to take over.

"Oh…" was the only thing Clarisse was able to say, a warm smile forming on her lips as Joseph put his arm around her waist, grabbing her other hand and continued the dance. The silent felt awkward. Joseph saw that perhaps, they would communicate through their eyes. He took the liberty of diving into Clarisse's, noticing how they were particularly sparkling. Her eyes have that sparkle, but he's never noticed that one before; until that moment…

Clarisse would get lost in his eyes, forgetting the world surrounding them. Thought sometimes she would lift her head up and watch Mia who was still dancing with that boy, Michael. There was something going on between those two, it is palpable. Clarisse smiled broadly when she saw Michael leading Amelia toward the garden.

"They had the same idea I had but now the garden is occupado!" Said Joseph, looking brightly at the woman he held in his arms, the woman he knew he was in love with. Clarisse smiled at him, although a hint of insecurity could be seen in her eyes. As a response, Joseph squeezed her hand lightly, which got her Majesty to drop her smile, drop her jaw open. Regaining her senses, she'd close her mouth, closes and opens her eyes and escape a sigh, smiling again at him.

Amelia and Michael came back in the ballroom hand in hand, exchanging looks… They went toward the person in charge of music and requested actual music. She was heard, the waltzes changed for an upbeat music, which got Mia to receive an awkward look from her grandmother but soon, both would exchange a smile.

"Joseph?" Clarisse called, turning around.

"Your Majesty?" Joseph answered automatically.

"Would… would you… would you like… a… cup of tea?" she asked him softly.

"Tea, your Majesty? I'd be delighted." He was thinking how this would turn out. He knew he was attracted to her. Would she be attracted to him? "It's in her eyes…" he thought to himself. They walked together toward the kitchen to get the tea but instead, at her surprise, Joseph discarded the standing guards, wanting some privacy with Clarisse, for he could talk with her properly. He didn't cared if the gesture of talking to her the way he would, would cost him his job.

She felt her knees buckle when Joseph took her hand and kissed it softly, almost intimately, which made her blush. She couldn't deny it but yet she would have to keep her feelings for herself. Why did she offer him to have tea in the firs place? They would be alone. The awkward silence between them would fill the air. Not what she wanted… Clarisse could throw herself in his arms either, telling him that she feels something for him. Those thoughts surprised her. Since when would she have feelings anyway? She was known for being an iron butterfly, always hiding her feelings, her true feelings. Yet Clarisse wouldn't bear to be thought as a wholesome, as an open book. That's why she protects herself. And she has a duty to Genovia on top of that…

"You are a tower of strength. You're like a thoroughbred in a world of mutts. No, you know what you are; you're like a great portrait over a fireplace. Words have been invited to describe women like you…" How dare he could say those things to her? Clarisse raised an eyebrow, taking a sip of her tea.

"Such as flinty and… impervious. I think you're formidable. I think your strength defines you. But it's thrilling when your defenses are down arid you're not isolated. That, I believe, is your winning combo. A killer combo actually." He finished telling her before adding:

"I can't get enough of watching you. I notice the way you walk, the way you act… How you have a different smile depending on if you would be talking to Mia. You'd have another smile when you would speak to Charlotte; another one when you exchange pleasant words with a friend and… you have the best one when you're looking at me." He looked intensively at her, waiting for her to say something. He knew he might have gone too far because the drape he often witnesses in her eyes was up, as she got up from her chair and left the room, a thoughtful look on her face. What had he just done?


	3. Chapter 3

Back in her room, Clarisse discarded her maids, for she could be alone and try to think about what had just happened. She got out of her gown and changed into her white satin pyjama. Clarisse walked around in circles in her room, trying to focus. "Perhaps maybe music could help," she thought, looking at her stereo. She sat down in front of the foyer, closed her eyes and let herself being enveloped by the music that would take her away.

"_Don't talk of stars burning above; if you're in love, show me. Tell me no dreams filled with desire; if you're on fire, show me. Here we are together in the middle of the night; don't talk of spring just hold me tight. Anyone who's ever been in love will tell you that this is no time for a chat! Haven't your lips longed for my touch; don't say how much, show me. Don't talk of love lasting through time; make me no undying vows, show me now! Sing me no song, read me no rhyme; don't waste my time, show me. Please don't implore, beg or beseech; don't make a speech, show me. Never do I have to hear another word; there isn't one I haven't heard. Here we are together better not to be a dream; say one more word and I'll scream! Haven't your arms hungered for mine; please don't explain, show me. Don't wait until, wrinkles and lines pop out all over my brow; show me now!"_

"Damn you Joseph…" were the words she said as she slammed her hands on the table in front of her. Clarisse brought her hands to her face, sat down on the floor and broke down in tears.

"Why bother? I've been able to pull myself together all my life! But now look at me; what am I to do?" she said, wiping away her tears. What she didn't know was that Joseph had his back against her door, uncertain if he would enter or leave her alone. He couldn't bear to hear her broking down; knocked softly on the door.

"Come in" Clarisse said in a somewhat broken voice, quickly making sure there were no tears in her eyes. She immediately got up but instantly fell on the sofa when she saw it was Joseph. He saw she was clearly broking down. Was it because of what he had said or was there something bothering her mind?

She would have pushed him away when he got to her, encircling his arms around her to comfort her. Couldn't he see that his embrace was poisoning her even more? Couldn't he feel how lifeless she felt then, having no power over her body, her mind, her heart…

"I don't know what to do about everything you've told me Joseph, how dare you! How dare can you dive into my eyes, searching my soul for something I can't give you? How dare can you make me feel like this? How dare can you make me tell you that I don't know how I should feel about you as you'd be the only person who really got me…" Clarisse told him, tightening her grasp on him, crying harder. She did hurt him, he wouldn't know either. A tear escaped his eye, slowly rolling down his cheek.

"Oh, Clarisse!" Joseph said as he burdened his head in her hair. Stroking his fingers in her thin light-brown hair. He jumped when Clarisse had put her hands on the back of his neck, breathing on his skin, making Joseph shiver by the warmth of her breath on his flesh. He drew a deeper sigh when she placed her lips on his neck, just under his jaw line. Realising what was she had just done, that without any reason, she got carried away, she pulled away…

"Clarisse? A Queen? Getting carried away? Oh… tush!" she thought, loosening her hold on Joseph, getting up as fast as she could and thanked him for the tea; she didn't know what to think anymore.

A soft voice woke her; Charlotte. For a minute Clarisse was wondering if she has been dreaming or that feeling of sickness was real. Why was she on the sofa? She looked around, seemed lost.

"Is everything alright your Majesty?" Charlotte asked, fearing anything would be wrong for the Queen.

"Yes Charlotte thank you." Clarisse answered as if she wouldn't know what Charlotte was talking about.

"Of course your Majesty. The car will leave for the airport in an hour" the young woman added, bowing as she left.

Clarisse shook her head, heading toward her belonging, getting ready to leave the embassy to go back home in Genovia. She felt rather concerned for Joseph's behavior that morning; he was her head of security but she hasn't seen him of all morning.

"He left early for the airport to make sure everything is fine for the departure." Charlotte told Clarisse when she enquired where Joseph was.

She got out of the building; sat in the car and off she was to the airport. She did miss home but was more than glad she came in the United States. She arrived alone and left with an heir to the throne of Genovia "and a feeling I've never experienced before…" she added to herself.

Clarisse thought about sleeping during the flight but there was much to be done. Paperwork, paperwork and… more paperwork. Nobody except of Charlotte went near her; Joseph was obviously occupied with important matters concerning Amelia. The twelve-hour flight from San Francisco to Genovia was a nightmare. The awkwardness of the ambiance in the plane weighted much on Clarisse's shoulder.

"Charlotte… let's take a break" her Majesty asked. She needed it obviously. Charlotte couldn't do anything but agree. But what was supposed to be a small break lasted until the end of the trip back home. Still, Joseph didn't show up at the back of the plane.

"Send me Joseph, Charlotte, now" Clarisse asked, as soon as she put her foot in the palace, before heading toward her office.

"Yes your Majesty, right away." Charlotte nodded.

What was she to tell him? Clarisse wouldn't want to hurt him more than she has already. He did hurt her too, hasn't he seen that? "Would I be that impervious? Nonsense…" she thought, sitting in her chair, having a look at paper that were left on her desk when they left for America.

He didn't have the time to knock that Clarisse gave him permission to enter.

"You called for me your Majesty?" He enquired, bowing.

"Joseph, please don't, not now" she quickly replied.

"What do you want me to do Clarisse?" He asked her, his voice breaking now and then as he spoke.

She had no answer to give him. Since when would she have to explain herself? She had a duty to the people of Genovia, a duty toward her granddaughter that was to be moving to the country as soon as school ends in a year; she also had a duty to herself… At the thought, she shook her head.

"That's what I thought…" Joseph said before he left the office. Clarisse tried to hold herself but couldn't do it. After he was out of sight, she went to the door, locked it and crawled to the floor, crying, trembling. But how she has been able to get up she wouldn't know… Clarisse scolded her jacket, unlocked the door and went back to paperwork.

"Isn't it ridiculous? We've only spoke freely to each other; there is no need to make such a fuss. You must pull yourself together Clarisse. He'll probably be back being who he was "before". Everything will be fine." She thought to herself, drying her tears.

When they would look at each other, the sparkle would be gone but not entirely. Perhaps, it would be deeply hidden. They still found the way to see it remained there. They only had to find the power not to drawn…

"Your Majesty, Prime minister Motaz, Your Highness, here's the deal…" Charlotte told them as they got in the car, heading toward the orphanage that would have to close its doors if no solution would be found.

"There must be a way to help, to do something!" said Prime minister Motaz.

"Of course there is! We don't loose it Sebastian, we find it!" answered Clarisse to Motaz's desperation. They would need to find 65 millions in order to keep the orphanage alive. Yet, the money wouldn't only be applied to the institution but Amelia suggested that they create some sort of foundation that would be in place to help the families in need; need of money or even if it's only to find a babysitter… Clarisse, Sebastian and Charlotte looked at each other for a moment, looked at Amelia; she had a broad smile lighting her face.

They stayed at the orphanage for about an hour, met the children and the present reporters. They would prefer being alone with the children and the staff but it was important that the institutions had the media coverage it needed. The group had to take good note of every little detail in order to convince the parliament members to agree to the 65 million investments. Though they would have to find the money, Genovia's budget being kept on a funny way. "Her Majesty shall take care of that," Charlotte thought to herself, raising a brow at Clarisse, like if she would have known what the woman was thinking.

"We cannot have to money to save the orphanage, we don't have it!" Shouted Lord Pallimore, his remark being received with questioning looks from Her Majesty and the Prime minister.

"Perhaps let's look back at the budget shall we?" advanced Prime minister Motaz.

"The budget… Prime minister?" exclaimed Lord Fricker.

"Adjustments need to be done. Actually…" before continuing, Sebastian looks at Her Majesty for some aprovement. Clarisse did nod her head in sign of approval.

"I ask a delay of twenty-four hours, after which I shall come with a plan on the new structure for the budget!" claimed the Prime Minister.

"Meeting suspended! Prime Minister Motaz, you have twenty-four hours. Let the work begin!" Ordered Her Majesty.

Sebastian and Clarisse worked late that night, making cuts here and there in the budget. It wasn't Her Majesty's job to have a look at the numbers, but she wanted something to be done. She wondered how Mia could handle this. She called Charlotte to have Mia sent to her immediately. Amelia was almost asleep in her room…

"Do you want me to die? You know what time it is!" said Mia at the other end.

"I'm sorry Your Highness, Her Majesty's order!" Charlotte answered back.

Amelia got up and went slowly toward her grandmother's office. Instead of knocking on the door, she banged her head repeatedly on the door, to let Clarisse know how she just wanted to go to bed.

"Come in Mia." She simply said.

"Do you know what time it is?" She said toward her grandmother, as she hasn't noticed the Prime Minister's presence.

"Eh Mia, we have a guest. Please sit down and take a look at these. Would you have any suggestion?" Clarisse asked her.

" Eh… Grandma? I didn't need a sleeping pill you know…" Mia said back, which made Motaz laugh. Mia returned his smile but Clarisse was quite annoyed by her granddaughter's behavior in front of the Prime Minister, as she may have to face the same problems when she'll be Queen. Clarisse handed her the papers and she looked at them. The numbers were dancing in front of her eyes. "How could one find this much money?" she thought.

"Close your mouth Mia we are not a codfish!" Clarisse said, looking a bit embarrassed at her Prime Minister. "How could he enjoy this… this… oh, bother" she thought to herself, taking back the papers from Mia's hands.

"I'm not very good at this but it could be worth a try and you did ask me what I thought so… I'll tell you."

"Eh, Mia? Don't tell us you'll tell us something darling, just say it!" Clarisse exclaimed.

"Well, there could be some cuts here and there…" Mia said, looking at the papers and moving her head as if she would be looking at a puzzle. "How many people in Genovia have a car?" she added.

"About fifty thousand." Answered Motaz, looking at other papers.

"Fifty thousand? Oh, alright… Where to they get those?" Mia asked, unsure of where she would be getting with her point.

"At… a… car dealer Your Highness"

"I think that what Mia is trying to bring is how much is spent on the publicity for those cars." Clarisse said, smiling at her granddaughter.

"Yes, that's it, yes!"

"Publicity for transportation reaches five millions." Motaz said, clearing his throat.

"Five millions for publicity when people who buy cars already trust their reliability?" Mia asked.

"Eh, yes Your Highness. But it also comes to publicity for public transportation." Motaz added.

So the work went on. They didn't go to sleep until around 1:30AM. They've found the sixty-five millions needed to save the orphanage. Clarisse walked Mia back to her room, her arm around her shoulder. She was proud of her granddaughter.

"I know it wasn't easy darling but at what you've just accomplished; you've saved an orphanage and on top of that, you've brought the possibility of creating a programme whose purpose would be to help the people in need. I'm… I'm p… Good job Mia!" Why couldn't Clarisse tell how she felt? Telling Mia how proud she was of what she has done.

"Thank you grandma. Well, sweet dreams!" she said as she entered her room.

"Sleep well darling." Clarisse told as she kissed her granddaughter's forehead. "I shall look for your suite to be ready soon…" she added before leaving toward her private quarters.

Since they came back from San Francisco, Clarisse's schedule had never been busier. Amelia was on her way of becoming a fine princess. When they would have guests, she would behave, act properly. As little time passed by, the young woman gained confidence in herself. Clarisse noticed it; everybody noticed it, especially Joseph, who had many talks with her. Yet Amelia could tell he was keeping some kind of secret away from her but didn't ask him about it.

"_How can I just let you walk away, just let you leave without a trace? When I stand here taking every breath with you; you're the only one really knew me at all. How can you just walk away from me, when all I can do is watch you leave? 'cause we've shared the laughter and the pain, and even shared the tears; you're the only one who really knew me at all. So take a look at me now; 'cause there's just an empty space and there's nothing left here to remind me, just the memory of your face, so take a look at me now 'cause there's just an empty space, and you coming back to me is against all odds and that's what I've got to face…"_

"Olivia?" Clarisse called quickly before she would collapse on the sofa. The maid rushed in.

"Your Majesty…"

"Did someone come in my suite?"

"Not that I'm not aware of Your Majesty" Olivia answered as she exited the room, leaving Clarisse alone in an almost totally dark room. As soon as the maid got out, Clarisse sat on the sofa, playing with the disc with her fingers, running them across to writing on the cover.

"Against All Odds" it read. Clarisse also found small drawing at the bottom of the disc; an arrow that pointed toward her balcony.

She opened her double French doors and held her breath as she saw Joseph standing there. Apparently he had been waiting for her.

"Don't run away, he said, I just thought we could have tea." Joseph said to her, inviting her to sit down at the small table.

"Was there something that happened Your Majesty?" he enquired.

"Aren't we doing fine with the way things are at the moment? Amelia is a marvelous princess, she shall be a fabulous Queen for Genovia, she's saved an orphanage and created a programme for the people in need… I don't think anything happened Joseph." Clarisse answered him rather coldly.

"It's… not what I meant, Clarisse and you know what I meant." He said back on her last comment. It clearly wasn't the answer he was waiting for.

"What do you want me to tell you Joseph?"

"I want you to tell me you don't feel your cheeks redden each I'd catch your glance; that you don't feel you knee buckle every time I'd have my hand on your back, leading you wherever you go. That you don't accept the fact that I'm there for Mia and ready to do everything she would ask me to do because I deeply care about her… Clarisse?" he was looking at her but all he could see was the fear that was in her eyes and that drape that would eternally hide her thoughts, her feelings.

"I… not for the moment Joseph. How dare you bring it on to me when I've managed to find a way to go with it! How dare you?" was all she could say. It wasn't her goal to hurt him but he was, more than she would know."

"I'd just want our friendship to be brought out of the shadow, that's what I want from you Clarisse." He said, leaning a bit closer and speaking in a somewhat intimate tone.

"Don't, Joseph, not now! I'd like to rest."

"Of course, YOUR MAJESTY!" he had to accentuate her title to show just a tad of how angry he was. The thought of thinking about her duty to the country escaped his mind a while ago, when he'd notice Clarisse, not the Queen. He stormed out of her room, went back to his.

"Damn you Joseph…" she felt powerless, just crawled back into her room and got on her bed where she'd lie down and cry until she'd be too tired to let another tear fall down.

"Princess Mia shall have thirty days to get married, otherwise the throne will be Lord Devereau's!" Clarisse couldn't believe what she'd just heard. She called Mia to meet her in the throne room right away but the young woman couldn't be found. Clarisse went toward the room to glance at the portraits of each Renaldi that ruled the country. She stopped her pace in front of a painting of her and Rupert. She thought about the happy times they shared and some bad ones; how awkward she felt when she's been told that she would have to marry her best friend. Clarisse couldn't protest, as she was aware of the etiquette when it comes to marriage. It was still customary in Genovia to have organized marriage. Later she would understand that her father did it to keep the bloodline.

"You wanted to see me grandma?" Mia asked as she walked it, waking Clarisse from her thoughts.

"You won't like what I would propose but see it as an opportunity. I had to… deal with the same dilemma many years ago." She calmly said to her granddaughter, who raised an eyebrow.

"Try me!"

"I was lucky to be married to Rupert, as he was my best friend…" she started saying when Mia cut her, seeing where this would be going.

"I will not accept that!" the young woman replied.

"Mia, courage is not the absence of fear…"

"… but rather the judgment that something else is more important than fear… I know grandma." Mia said, looking at her father's portrait that was hanging proudly on the wall.

That night they would look at the "possibilities". Charlotte had it all organized and they were all in the multimedia room. They laughed, screamed in disgust, as the slides of every available bachelor would scroll in front of her eyes.

"His Highness Prince William of England." Announced Charlotte

"I totally accept, yes!" Mia said, rushing her words.

"He's not available because he's heir to his own throne." Charlotte said, to Mia's disappointment.

"Why is he there then?" Mia asked.

"Oh, I just love to look at him…." Charlotte said, tilting her head, dreaming.

"Oh yes, me too." Said Clarisse. They all froze and looked at her. She raised her brow and they all laughed childishly. "Such a light evening is more than welcome!" Thought Clarisse, when her smile went across the room, reaching Joseph. She immediately looked back at the slides. Mia's eyes stopped on a handsome duke named Andrew. He was slightly older than she was but not too much to feel the wedding being odd. Mia recognised he had something attractive so was whiling to meet him, getting to know him better.

Since Mia's choice was made that night, Charlotte began to organise the meetings for the two young people. They went walking by the beach since in was a sunny day. Amelia and Andrew didn't quite hit it off, but there was already something between them. Andrews came more often at the Palace, getting to know the surroundings. Within a week, Mia had agreed to his marriage proposal, though she wasn't sure of what she was doing exactly.

"_Selections for Royal wedding ceremony…"_ could be heard from the stereo that was in the grand hall where Clarisse would choose the china and the music that would entertain the guests for the ceremony following Mia and Andrew's wedding. The music was soft, gentle… Clarisse began to dance to the rhythm of the music, turning in circles when Joseph caught her and began to dance with her. Her expression softened and she rested her head on his chest. She didn't bother if she was wrong or not, she needed comfort and he was there. Plus, he didn't backed up when she rested her head.

"Oh, Joseph… Let me rest my head on your chest until the end of time, not just for the time of a dance. If I'd tell you that I love you, would it change everything?" Clarisse thought to herself. She would have told him this very moment but she felt she would be unfair to him…

"Clarisse, have you thought about…" He asked her, almost whispering in her ear.

"Yes, I have…" she answered on such a tone that he understood that there really were no hope for them of being together. After all he had told her, after all they'd share, all they'd endured when they were "apart"…

"Oh, I understand Your Majesty!" he said as he bowed and went away. Clarisse tried to catch his hand to make him stop but he would take his hand from hers. She went to the tables, dropping her hands on it using the wall to support her back, for her not to fall in pieces on the floor.

"Your Majesty I…" said Charlotte as she was heading downstairs to continue explaining details to Clarisse but Clarisse cut her, her voice was broken, tears would soon begin to fall down to her cheeks.

"Not now Charlotte, I…"

"I understand Your Majesty." She answered back, going back to her occupations. Clarisse looked back at the china she had to choose for the dinner but couldn't get her thoughts together for the moment. She went up to her private quarters, cried herself to sleep. "This is so hard… What will I do?" she said, whispering in the darkness of her room…

"_Cannot touch, cannot hold, cannot be together… Cannot love, cannot kiss, cannot have each other… Must be strong and we must let go, cannot say what our hearts must know… How can I not love you, what do I tell my heart? When do I not want you… here in my arms? How does one walks away from all of the memories? How do I not miss you when you are gone? Cannot dream, cannot share sweet and tender moments… Cannot feel how we feel; must pretend it's over! Must be brave and we must go on; must not say what we no longer long…"_

"Something you wanted Your Majesty?" asked Charlotte as she entered the Queen's office.

"Yes Charlotte… Book a flight for me and Mia right away." Said Clarisse.

"Where, Your Majesty?"

"Anywhere…" answered Clarisse, exasperated.

"You said, Majesty?" Enquired Charlotte, not certain of what Clarisse wanted.

"Santorini!" exclaimed the Queen.

"Santorini? Santorini as in…" The young woman started to reply but was cut off.

"Yes, thank you Charlotte".

"I'll call right away ma'am. I'll also tell Joseph to get packed" Charlotte said as she went out of the office, heading toward her on to make the call and information Her Highness. Mia would have to cancel her meetings with Andrew.

"No!" shouted the Queen.

"No Joseph, ma'am?"

"He needs a little vacation; I've noticed there was something troubling his mind lately. Perhaps he would need to take time for himself for once… Send Shades." Asked the Queen. She didn't want to tell her secretary what was troubling Joseph's mind.

Joseph accepted this vacation with a relief. He had so much on his shoulder that he needed to let go… The first thing was Clarisse… "How did everything happen? Do I want to know?" he thought to himself while packing. As soon as he was ready, he rushed downstairs but arrived face to face with Her Majesty. He simply nodded, saying the customary "Your Majesty" and Clarisse to nod saying "Joseph" and they both went their way, which looked awkward for everyone who was witness to the moment. Mia didn't dare to say anything but silently followed her grandmother.

The ride to the airport seemed to last forever; the silence being awfully awkward. "And Joseph isn't even here!" thought Clarisse, looking at her granddaughter. "Look at her… She's… radiant! If I could tell her just how proud I am of all she went through to get there!" It was now Mia's turn to stare at her grandmother, wondering what could possibly on the woman's mind.

"Is there something wrong grandmother? You're not saying anything…" Amelia enquired.

"I was thinking about… of what you've done since we began our sessions. Mia?"

Mia's eyes had widened. Just what her grandmother could be up to?

"I want you to know that… I want to tell you that… Well… I…" Why couldn't she say it? She was only her granddaughter!

"Grandma! Shoot!" exclaimed Mia, which made Clarisse laugh.

"Alright I'll shoot… Amelia, I really am proud of what you've done so far! Never did I have a doubt that you would be a fine princess. I think you also notice all the changes as well… You'll be… a marvelous Queen for Genovia!" she said to her granddaughter. As soon as she finished, Mia sledded closer to her grandmother and held her tight.

During the flight, Clarisse and Amelia had the occasion of spending time together, talking; one discovering a bit of the other. That awkward silence that had filled the air on their way to the airport had dropped a while ago. They would talk, drink tea, etc. Even that night, after a long day visiting the island and Athena, they put their pyjamas, lied down on the couches and watched some movie that was playing on the television. Both were so tired that they fell asleep and laughed when they woke up the day after because they couldn't remember they've fallen asleep in front of the television.

"You know what I hated about school, really?" Amelia told her grandmother as she took a sip of her tea.

"I don't know Mia, tell me." Enquired Clarisse. Those small talks with her granddaughter meant a lot to her. They would talk about something, about nothing. For Clarisse, those nothings felt like more of those somethings they could talk about. She was grateful for that. As for Amelia, she was glad that she's found her grandmother; glad she and her have this connection, wherever it came from.

"It's… frustrating to understand, to feel how little you know; understand that whatever it is you do, you can never know everything!"

"We have to take the best out of it Mia. It's a vicious circle; one learns something new anytime, any moment and understands how little one knows. Then you learn more because you know you can't know everything and that makes you realise you still can't know everything…" Clarisse told her granddaughter as she would stare somewhere no one would be; in her memory. How she loved her history courses; learning about all of those civilisations. There were just so many facts to learn, to memorise, books to read, etc. Like Mia, the more she learned, the more she understood she didn't know anything. The more she understood she didn't know everything, the more she wanted to learn…

Clarisse didn't allow herself much to think about Joseph, about what happened between them; if something had ever happened… She deeply hoped he was doing fine but another part of herself wanted to look after him, find him and bring him to her so she could spend the rest of her life simply enjoying his presence. She burdened herself into books, museum visits and many more activities with Mia. Shades didn't protest as he enjoyed his time with them. Clarisse had asked him to relax while they were there, as she didn't want any additional tension to fill the air. Clarisse and Amelia could talk about the marriage.

"I like Andrew, grandmother…"

"I'm glad to hear you saying that; I was beginning to worry about where this would be going." Answered back Clarisse.

"But I don't think I love him. What would I be supposed to do?" asked Mia as she looked at pictures of her possible gowns.

"Mia, whatever choice you'll make, I'll always be proud of you. You can choose not to marry Andrew and live a comfortable life as Princess of Genovia. That, you can.

"Thank you grandmother…" Mia said, rolling her eyes, thinking about any solution that would come to her mind. Drinking tea and exchanging much laughter, they finished organizing the wedding. Still, Amelia didn't know if she wanted to go through the engagement or leave it just as it could be; she would remain Princess of Genovia.

"Something you wanted Your Majesty?" asked Charlotte as she entered the Queen's office.

"Yes Charlotte… Book a flight for me and Mia right away." Said Clarisse.

"Where, Your Majesty?"

"Anywhere…" answered Clarisse, exasperated.

"You said, Majesty?" Enquired Charlotte, not certain of what Clarisse wanted.

"Santorini!" exclaimed the Queen.

"Santorini? Santorini as in…" The young woman started to reply but was cut off.

"Yes, thank you Charlotte".

"I'll call right away ma'am. I'll also tell Joseph to get packed" Charlotte said as she went out of the office, heading toward her on to make the call and information Her Highness. Mia would have to cancel her meetings with Andrew.

"No!" shouted the Queen.

"No Joseph, ma'am?"

"He needs a little vacation; I've noticed there was something troubling his mind lately. Perhaps he would need to take time for himself for once… Send Shades." Asked the Queen. She didn't want to tell her secretary what was troubling Joseph's mind.

Joseph accepted this vacation with a relief. He had so much on his shoulder that he needed to let go… The first thing was Clarisse… "How did everything happen? Do I want to know?" he thought to himself while packing. As soon as he was ready, he rushed downstairs but arrived face to face with Her Majesty. He simply nodded, saying the customary "Your Majesty" and Clarisse to nod saying "Joseph" and they both went their way, which looked awkward for everyone who was witness to the moment. Mia didn't dare to say anything but silently followed her grandmother.

The ride to the airport seemed to last forever; the silence being awfully awkward. "And Joseph isn't even here!" thought Clarisse, looking at her granddaughter. "Look at her… She's… radiant! If I could tell her just how proud I am of all she went through to get there!" It was now Mia's turn to stare at her grandmother, wondering what could possibly on the woman's mind.

"Is there something wrong grandmother? You're not saying anything…" Amelia enquired.

"I was thinking about… of what you've done since we began our sessions. Mia?"

Mia's eyes had widened. Just what her grandmother could be up to?

"I want you to know that… I want to tell you that… Well… I…" Why couldn't she say it? She was only her granddaughter!

"Grandma! Shoot!" exclaimed Mia, which made Clarisse laugh.

"Alright I'll shoot… Amelia, I really am proud of what you've done so far! Never did I have a doubt that you would be a fine princess. I think you also notice all the changes as well… You'll be… a marvelous Queen for Genovia!" she said to her granddaughter. As soon as she finished, Mia sledded closer to her grandmother and held her tight.

During the flight, Clarisse and Amelia had the occasion of spending time together, talking; one discovering a bit of the other. That awkward silence that had filled the air on their way to the airport had dropped a while ago. They would talk, drink tea, etc. Even that night, after a long day visiting the island and Athena, they put their pyjamas, lied down on the couches and watched some movie that was playing on the television. Both were so tired that they fell asleep and laughed when they woke up the day after because they couldn't remember they've fallen asleep in front of the television.

"You know what I hated about school, really?" Amelia told her grandmother as she took a sip of her tea.

"I don't know Mia, tell me." Enquired Clarisse. Those small talks with her granddaughter meant a lot to her. They would talk about something, about nothing. For Clarisse, those nothings felt like more of those somethings they could talk about. She was grateful for that. As for Amelia, she was glad that she's found her grandmother; glad she and her have this connection, wherever it came from.

"It's… frustrating to understand, to feel how little you know; understand that whatever it is you do, you can never know everything!"

"We have to take the best out of it Mia. It's a vicious circle; one learns something new anytime, any moment and understands how little one knows. Then you learn more because you know you can't know everything and that makes you realise you still can't know everything…" Clarisse told her granddaughter as she would stare somewhere no one would be; in her memory. How she loved her history courses; learning about all of those civilisations. There were just so many facts to learn, to memorise, books to read, etc. Like Mia, the more she learned, the more she understood she didn't know anything. The more she understood she didn't know everything, the more she wanted to learn…

Clarisse didn't allow herself much to think about Joseph, about what happened between them; if something had ever happened… She deeply hoped he was doing fine but another part of herself wanted to look after him, find him and bring him to her so she could spend the rest of her life simply enjoying his presence. She burdened herself into books, museum visits and many more activities with Mia. Shades didn't protest as he enjoyed his time with them. Clarisse had asked him to relax while they were there, as she didn't want any additional tension to fill the air. Clarisse and Amelia could talk about the marriage.

"I like Andrew, grandmother…"

"I'm glad to hear you saying that; I was beginning to worry about where this would be going." Answered back Clarisse.

"But I don't think I love him. What would I be supposed to do?" asked Mia as she looked at pictures of her possible gowns.

"Mia, whatever choice you'll make, I'll always be proud of you. You can choose not to marry Andrew and live a comfortable life as Princess of Genovia. That, you can.

"Thank you grandmother…" Mia said, rolling her eyes, thinking about any solution that would come to her mind. Drinking tea and exchanging much laughter, they finished organizing the wedding. Still, Amelia didn't know if she wanted to go through the engagement or leave it just as it could be; she would remain Princess of Genovia.

"Can you believe I have to get married today Fat Louis? … Neither can I!" Said Mia as she started to get ready for her wedding. HER WEDDING! She was nervous but Lily was there to help her go through last minute details. It didn't take her long to be ready. She went to Clarisse's quarters for her benediction and they all left for the church.

Amelia wanted to run away but she remembered her grandmother's words that the choice was hers after all; she could become the Queen of Genovia by marrying Andrew or remain Princess of Genovia. Whatever choice she would have to do would have to come from her heart. Clarisse had chosen duty over love. Even if she would never have admitted it, she was in love and because she chose duty first, she lost the only man she's ever loved.

Mia sensed that Andrew was as nervous as she was. She went to him after almost running through the aisle…

"Everyone deserves the chance to find true love, right?" Mia started, starring at Andrew.

"Well, yes…" He answered her.

"Including us?" she asked, handing him the ring had had given to her.

With the help of Prime Minister Motaz, Amelia proposed a motion as any future Queen of Genovian would have the right to rule with or without a husband. The motion was accepted. Mia had reached another step in her process and Clarisse's duty for Genovia would end the day she would pass the crown to her Amelia…

"Lionel?" she asked, looking behind her for the young security guard. He stepped forward and she took his earphone set and asked for Charlotte to have a word with her grandmother.

"Grandma, it doesn't mean if I don't have my fairytale you can't have yours!" she simply said to her grandmother, who would now be the Queen mother. Clarisse looked around her, smiled at Charlotte who fainted not to have heard a word of what Mia had just said to her. Then she turned toward Joseph…

"Joseph?" she started, nervous as ever but yet she had found the way of hiding it. "Dear, dear Joseph…" she continued. He raised a brow at her. "Just what would it be now?" he thought to himself. He step forward and bowed lightly.

"Your Majesty." His eyes were dark, almost lifeless.

"Would I… Would I be too late to ask you to accept my hand in marriage?"

He grinned a little, his expression never softened; he thought for a few seconds...

"I thought you'd never ask…" He answered, handing his top hat and gloves to Shades, who was standing at the other side of the door. "You're in charge now; I am going to a wedding!" his eyes softened as he offered his arm to Clarisse and she took it. How the feeling of his heart stopping to beat as she touched him was invading him. They just looked at each other and smiled. They were there, finally!

He had every trouble to put a feet forward of the other, he was taken away, walking her through the aisle toward the archbishop. Clarisse felt his nervousness because she was as nervous as he was but somewhat she just thought it felt right. But would all of these people have to be starring at them?

Joseph took great delight in feeling the weight of Clarisse's hand on his. They were walking toward the archbishop... The idea, the reality of the moment still hadn't cross his mind. Joseph was walking Clarisse through the aisle... He felt light-headed but there were so many interrogations in his mind that he didn't know what to think. "Is there really something to think about right now?" he thought to himself, trying to smile to Clarisse but failed miserably. "It'll be alright." She thought. "Oh Joseph, how could I hide it for so long?" she added to herself. As he caught her glance, he couldn't help but notice the reflection of light in her sparkling eyes.

After what seemed to be a moment that went as fast as a wink, they've reached the archbishop. Joseph wouldn't let go of her hand as the archbishop pronounced the union. She didn't want him to let her walk away again.

"You may kiss the bride." Said the archbishop to Joseph, leaning a bit toward him, a smile forming on his lips since he knew how Joseph loved Clarisse for a long time. "The poor man must have dreamed of touching her heart." The archbishop thought to himself.

Joseph smiled back but as much as he wanted to lean forward toward Clarisse to capture her lips he has dreamed about for so long but he couldn't move an inch. He was certain he would be pinched and brought back to reality. It was Clarisse who made the move. "To hell with the embarrassment of my making the move." She thought for a second before making a step toward Joseph, her face slowly leaning closer to his, to the point where she could feel is breath on her skin. It would be his cue. Joseph closed his eyes and leant forward, his lips lightly brushing Clarisse's.

"Oh dear God, I'm kissing her!" he thought as their light and soft kiss began to make them loose their senses but the stopped, thinking that perhaps they should keep the rest of the excitement of their first kiss for themselves. Both stepping away, they exchanged a glance. Clarisse smiled as her cheeks reddened and she escaped a deep breathe. Joseph was in another world. God knew where he was…

Together they marched through the aisle once more, walking toward the exit, where a car was waiting for them. On their way back, the witnesses would just look and be in awe, not willing to speak one word. They were wondering if what had just happened really happened… Did Her Majesty have just wed her head of security? Had Clarisse just being married to Joseph?

"What have just happened?" Joseph asked her, as they got into the car, more puzzled than he has ever been. Clarisse simply smiled at him, took his hand and leant closer to whisper to his ears:

'We've… hum… We've just been married, Joseph…" The warmth of her breath, the intimacy of her tone made him shivers. Noticing his reaction, she gently squeezed his hand more tightly with hers. He turned his head, facing her. His look was serious, almost emotionless but yet there was a hint of love in his eyes. Her soft smile dropped when she looked in his eyes. That moment seemed as if the world had stopped…

They had to stop by the palace to exchange the luggage for the honeymoon since it was Mia and Andrew's suitcases that were in the trunk. Clarisse went toward her quarters while Joseph went toward his room. "What do I have to bring?" they both thought. Joseph didn't have any casual clothes and as Clarisse browsed her wardrobe, she realised that she had absolutely no idea as to what she would have to wear. "What will I wear for that party?" she thought to herself, going through the countless evening gowns she possessed. Her hand finally reached, in the back, a classy yet simple black dress. She picked the dress and placed it on her bed before going back to her closet. Her cheeks reddened as she thought about what she would have to wear for… "Tonight".

Clarisse never did wear anything fancy or burlesque for the first night so she took her usual white satin pyjama. Yet she'd never thought about the fact that she and Joseph would be sleeping in the same bed. The idea made her blush deeply but Clarisse would admit to herself that she'd be longing for his touch of love. She longed to know what love really feels like, what it is to wake up next to the person you love and the person that loves you. Without paying too much attention to what she was doing, she began to cry but wiped the tears away as soon as she realised she was crying.

"Oh no you don't! You're supposed to be happy silly!" she said, laughing at herself. Actually, she couldn't remember the last time she would have cried of joy. Philippe and Pierre's birth... She finished packing and went downstairs back to the car.

Joseph picked a few pants, shirts and ties. All in black… He had no idea as to what he would have to bring. What would he have to wear tonight when they'll be all alone? Then again he had no idea. Would they really have to do what was expected from them tonight? The thought of brushing her skin made him grin. He accelerated his packing and went downstairs toward the car, ready to leave for the party.

During the ride from the palace to the reception, not a sound could be heard at the back of the car. Clarisse and Joseph would simply hold their hands, their fingers entwined and they would exchange a glance. Clarisse couldn't hold it; when he would dive into her eyes, she would turn her head away and blush. She had to let him dive into her soul; she had to open to him. What was she scared about? Why wouldn't she let someone see Clarisse? "He had already seen you!" She thought to herself as she looked back at him. He was still starring at her. Noticing her blush and thinking that perhaps if could help to relax a bit – who was he after, thinking about making her relax a bit when, after all he was probably more nervous than she was – to brush her cheek with his finger, tenderly. He leant closer and executed his move. Instead of helping her relax, she blushed more. That reaction made him smile; he would never tell her that seeing her go weak under his touch warmed his heart; she wouldn't accept the fact that someone could catch her off-guard, knock her defenses down.

He brought his other hand to take her chin and make her lean forward toward him. Clarisse felt her knees buckle; fortunately she wasn't standing. Inside she felt like laughing but somehow she held her serious face. There was only a shy smile forming on her lips. As Joseph was bringing her face closer to his, she closed her eyes; he smiled and leant forward. Their mouth seemed to hesitate, as they were not even one inch from on another. With a bit of impatience, Clarisse was the one to close the remaining distance and placed her lips against his.

Their lips moved to an unknown melody… As her hand went to rest on the back of his neck to bring him closer to her, she trembled and ended their kiss, pulling back and looked at a mesmerised Joseph that was only inches away from her. She'd never seen that look but recognised the familiar sparkle he'd have every time he would be looking at her. Why did break the kiss she wouldn't know but she saw that he didn't want it to and. Joseph felt his inner senses awaking slowly to her intoxicating lips. He knew Clarisse didn't know what to do, how to act. "I've never been in love… until today." She would say. Joseph closed the gap and captured his lips with hers, which made her escape a soft moan in his mouth. "This is promising..." he thought for a moment. Once again, she pulled back and tried to catch her breath. She looked intensely at him, as if she would be saying: "Oh God, Joseph, what are you doing to me?"

It was her that firmly crushed her lips against his, feeling a raw of passion suddenly. Joseph simply put his arms around her, pulling her closer to him. He would have wanted this moment never to end but they've reached their destination. Joseph got out of the car first, took a quick look around him to find that the only person that were there were photographs and journalists. Shaking his head, he offered his hand to Clarisse to help her out of the vehicle. He automatically brought his hand near her back, to let her know she was safe, that he has his eyes everywhere around. Clarisse stopped her pace, turned around to face him.

"What are you doing?" she asked him.

"My job!" he answered, still looking around, making sure the ground was safe. Then he realised what she meant.

"Your job? She replied. Hum, she said, smiling broadly but her smile dropped to show her serious face. Walk with me…" Hand in hand they walked together toward the reception where people were waiting for them to enter.

"Your Highness, Ladies and gentlemen, may I introduce Mr. and Mrs. Lord Joseph Romero of Genovia!" At the announcement, the people raised front their chair and acclaimed warmly the newlyweds. Clarisse, whose cheeks reddened, and Joseph exchanged a quick glance and smiled to the present guests, who bowed as they walked toward the table of honour. Out of the crowd, Clarisse saw Amelia who stepped in front of everyone, to receive a warm embrace from her grandmother, who whispered to her ear:

"Thank you my love…" Clarisse said. Mia smiled but her eyes were questioning. Had the Queen, her grandmother, Clarisse Renaldi, just say "thank you"? And… "my love"? Mia shook her head, thinking it would be better if she would simply cherish those few words.

Everybody took their places and waited for Clarisse to make the sign for them to sit. The waiters came to bring the first. Mia rose from her chair and hit her flute with her knife, which broke the flute. She smiled shyly and cleared her throat.

"Ahem… I don't think I would have seen this day coming but I'm certainly glad it did. I would think that we all knew that there was a sparkle between you two, before you did. I've got to know you, grandma and got to know you Joseph and I couldn't think of two people more perfect for the other. We look at you and… it just… fits! To the bride and groom! Now kiss her Joseph!" Clarisse's cheeks had reddened with Mia's speech and everybody was suddenly shouting for them to kiss. What was that behavior? Clarisse and Joseph exchanged a glance and were smiling broadly. Joseph leant forward Clarisse and tenderly kissed her cheek, thinking that, perhaps, it wouldn't be appropriate to kiss her – oh so soft - lips. To his

touch, Clarisse chuckled.

They went through the dinner without many interruptions; a course followed the other. After the dessert, when the tables were cleaned, the orchestra began to play a waltz. Joseph got up and asked Clarisse to dance.

"Madam, would you do me the honour of a dance?" Joseph asked her, presenting his hand to her.

"I'd be delighted, Sir" she answered. He led her to the center of the ballroom and extended his hand to reach her back. They've danced before, all right but Clarisse felt his touch being different. As his hand rested on her body, she dropped her smile and gazed toward him, the feeling of love awakens her inner hidden senses. Joseph smiled at her and waltz her through the dance floor, bringing her closer, passing his nose through her hair, breathing her delicate perfume. It was out of etiquette but he just couldn't help it.

They were silent, again, on their way to the airport. They would have to talk; there were many things to be discussed but for the moment, they wanted to embrace the tranquility. Tranquility? If their hearts would be drums there would be some infernal noise at the back of the car. Both didn't know how to act toward the other. Clarisse had separated herself from the world for far too long and Joseph, as much as he wanted to share even the smallest contact with her, he didn't want to scare her either by rushing things.

It didn't take long for the plane to take off. The flight shall last about two hours… Without thinking, Clarisse was the first to talk.

"What are you thinking about?" She asks Joseph, seeing him looking outside the window.

"To be honest, I don't know Clarisse." Was his answer. The tone he used warmed her heart; she felt some kind of easiness in it. They both smiled. Clarisse brought her head to place it on Joseph's shoulder and closed her eyes as she let out a sigh. Joseph had his hand on the top of her head; striking her hair with his fingers, enjoying the softness of her hair, how thin and light they feel, he then leant forward and kissed her forehead. Joseph adjusted himself in the seat and placed his head on Clarisse's; she was asleep. He played with his fingers in her hair before he fell asleep as well. They were awoken by the captain's announcement that they would be landing so they needed to buckle up.


	4. Chapter 4

Joseph opened the double door leading into the suite to Clarisse. Behind them followed one of the staff members that was carrying their suitcases. The young man put the luggage down, bowed to Clarisse and left.

The room had a dreamy glow from within. The air smelled roses, which some were displayed on the bed. Beside the bed was a bottle of champagne with fresh strawberries. Obviously, the hotel has been informed of their arrival. Since they would be here for two weeks, they decided that it would be better if they unpack and place their belongings into the closets. Clarisse and Joseph exchanged a look and both laughed childishly. Clarisse's cheeks reddened… Both were trying to relax but to think that they would be sharing the same bedroom for two weeks… for the rest of their lives! They unpacked and after they were done…

"If you'll excuse me for a moment, I shall go and get changed." Clarisse said to him. "I will not be too long." She added before disappearing in the bathroom with her white satin pyjama in one hand and her robe in the other. While she was changing, Joseph looked around the room and went toward the champagne bottle. He opened it and poured two glasses; then he went toward the couch that was in front of the foyer and sat down.

When she got out, she looked around, searching for Joseph.

"Lost something?" he said. She smiled and went toward him. Joseph gave her the glass of champagne he had poured for her. Clarisse sat down beside him and looked at the blazing fire. Distant, she seemed so lost in her thoughts. Joseph would take a look at her and couldn't help notice her tensed muscles. He could tell just by her posture. It wasn't easy for him either; he had wanted to touch her skin for far too long and now that he had every right to do so, he still felt as if he couldn't. Clarisse was aware of that and the thought that it would be her cue to make the first move scared her a bit. "What if he doesn't want me as much as I want him?" she thought for a second, before gazing at him. How deep his eyes seemed at this very moment, how intoxicating it would be to dive into it, how he looks somewhat nonchalant at the other end of the sofa…

"Is all of this real Clarisse?" Joseph finally asked her. Her smile softened and she turned her head toward him; his face was so serious and yet the light of the fire was reflecting in his eyes. Would her heart of ice ease his burning passion? Clarisse leant forward to Joseph who did put away his glass of champagne. He could see her face bigger as she got closer to him. Her eyes seemed to be locked with his. She'd put her hand forward her to slide it from his wrist, passing by his elbow, to his shoulder, to finally make it rest at the back of his neck. What was into her? As if she was now concient about what she was about to do, she shook her head and pulled away.

"I can't… not now… I'm not…" She said, starting to sob.

"I know… Shhhhh…" Joseph said, passing his arm around her shoulder to have her lying by his side. He rested his hand on her shoulder and kissed her forehead. This yet "ordinary" gesture made him tremble. Feeling him tremble, she lifts her head up, seemed not decided either to look at his eyes or his lips, she brought hers to captures his gently. She pulled back not long after, bringing back her head to rest on his chest and tried to relax. He slipped his body on the sofa, to be comfortable. She was supported against him and she followed. Clarisse felt secure, on such level she never did before. She closed her eyes and let herself be invaded by his delicate perfume.

Later in the night, Joseph woke up and found Clarisse still asleep, snuggled against him. The thought that they didn't have a "usual" wedding night didn't scare him before he wanted this first time to be when she would be ready. It would be Clarisse who would have to tell the rules, make the first move, because new that when the moment would be appropriate, he would freeze. "It would have been easier to let our senses take over when we danced that wango…" Joseph thought to himself as he looked at her; how angelic and peaceful she was. He leant forward and kissed her forehead, making her grin and move but yet she wouldn't wake up. Joseph slipped up from the sofa and walked toward the bathroom to change into his pyjama.

When he got back, he went to Clarisse and he picked her up. How light she seemed in his arms. Isn't an angel supposed to be light? He felt as if he were carrying the world in his hands, careful not to drop it, although the room was now darker. He was able to get one of his hands free to undo the sheets and he delicately put Clarisse on the bed then pulled the sheets to cover her body, brushing his fingers along her curves, as he would pull the sheets. She'd yawn something, turn over and continue to sleep. Joseph couldn't decide either he would slide in at her side or if he'd go sleep on the sofa. They weren't stranger anymore, thought he never thought they were, he was now his husband…

"Won't you join me in?" Clarisse asked softly. "She's half-asleep, she probably doesn't know what she's saying. Could she be talking when she sleeps?" Joseph thought to himself as a discreet smile formed on his lips. He slowly bent down toward the bed and got in beside Clarisse. Clarisse, his wife… Feeling that there was movement beside her, Clarisse rolled over on his side but as soon as she reached out to extend her arm and place it on his chest, she jumped surprised to find somebody by her side.

"Joseph! What are you doing here?" she said, nervously. He didn't have the time to rest his head on the pillow that he got straight up and looked at her.

"You… you ask me to join you in, Clarisse…" he said to her, not trying to get her to think she would have lost her mind.

"Why am I here by the way?" she replied.

"You've fell asleep on the couch and I thought you would be comfortable here."

"Well, I… I… I…was…comfortable…Joseph…" Had she just admit to him what she felt inside? Could she already be opening up to him? "What's the harm anyway?" she thought for a second before placing her glaze back on him and saw his grin.

"I'm nervous Joseph… I… I haven't shared my bed with anyone since…" Clarisse calmly said.

"I know…" Joseph answered. He passed his hand in her hair, bringing her closer so he could kiss her forehead.

"Come…" she added, taping her hand on the mattress, inviting him to lie down next to her.

She wouldn't need to place her request twice; he pulled the sheets off and slides in but stayed on his side of the bed. Clarisse went inches closer to him and whispered to his ear:

"Hold me…" She snuggled her head against his chest and rested her hand on his waist as he brought his arm and brushed his hand from her tummy and extended it until he had reach her waist, making her shiver under his touch.

_In the wee small hours of the morning, Clarisse still couldn't sleep. She opened her eyes and looked at Joseph, who was sleeping peacefully. "Could he be dreaming of me?" she wondered. Being careful not to wake him up, she gently kissed his forehead. She opened her suitcase and took out a book, untitled. In the center of the blank pages was a pen, which Clarisse picked up. She went to the foyer and sat on the sofa, on which she was sleeping earlier, being tossed against Joseph, their legs entwined, both quietly longing for a contact with the other. She opens her book, sits down and starts to think... That could be her weakness; thinking too much. She would have to listen to her heart. This relationship with Joseph was about her heart, not about Genovia. How could she find the power, the will to open up to him? She writes..._

"_We've done it, we're married! I think I was the first to be surprised by it. It all happened so quickly but still, it seemed like the minutes were hours instead. I'd take in each and every new scent, new emotion. Emotion? How can I have emotions and be so cold at the same time? They all seem to see me as the definition of being strong, flinty, and impervious but if they only knew how little I feel... I do what I believe is right... They don't have to know everything of what's going on with "me" so it made me become an "ice Queen"... I've been all my life... I still hear his words in my head, "would you open yourself?" it was frightening, I didn't know how. I don't think I do to this day. But it's so simple yet so complicated at the same time! I want to be with him, make him see who I am; I feel I have so much to give... Can I just let myself go? How he's always been by my side, how he would be there when I needed a friend... I didn't need to say something, he knew, he could read my eyes, read my soul. How did he manage to always seem to catch me off guard? How could he shatter that defense wall I've built and kept around myself all of my life? Does it really matter? I just want us to be together; it's simple..."_

Clarisse got straight up, touched her forehead; she has been sweating and she felt her cheeks had reddened. She looked at Joseph; he was peacefully sleeping. She decided to get up, to pull herself together and went toward the foyer. She looked at the stereo, then at Joseph and back at the stereo. She stopped thinking for a second and pressed play. She backed a bit and lied down on the sofa.

"_I don't know how to love him. What to do, how to move him? I've been changed, yes really changed. In these past few days, when I've seen myself, I seem like someone else. I don't know how to take this. I don't see why he moves me. He's a man. He's just a man. Should I bring him down? Should I scream and shout? Should I speak of love? Let my feelings out? I never thought I'd come to this. What's it all about? Don't you think it's rather funny? I should be in this position. I'm the one who's always been. So calm, so cool, no lover's fool. Running every show. What's it all about? I want him so. I love him so."_

Joseph stretched; slowly awaking to the delicious sound he could hear in the room. He turned around and saw that Clarisse wasn't there. He scanned the room but still couldn't find her. The French doors leading to the balcony were slightly open, making the drapes waltz sensually to the rhythm of the wind. He walked around in the room, went toward the balcony but she wasn't there. He turned around and saw her lying down on the couch; she was looking at the ceiling, "probably thinking", he thought.

He still wasn't sure if it was real; if Clarisse Renaldi was now his wife. HIS WIFE! Thinking how she would find the way to have him pull the drapes covering his soul, not letting anyone seeing through his eyes. How she would do simple gestures such as brushing his hand to remind him that she's there by his side, how her smile could take him to a world he's never known.

Clarisse heard him moving around in the room and got up from the sofa.

"It wasn't my intention to wake you, it's pretty early." She said, looking at him. He took a moment to look at the clock, which indicated 3:30AM. He daren't move and go toward her.

"Are you alright, Clarisse?" he asked, concerned at what she could possibly be up to at this hour.

"Hum hum!" she nodded. "I... I just needed to..." she didn't finish her sentence that some magnet made her walk toward him, slowly closing the gap between them, looking at him, searching his eyes. In a movement, she opened her arms wide open and somewhat shyly put them around him. He responded by placing one hand on her waist and the other at the back of her neck, bringing her closer to him. Their eyes locked and she leant her head closer to his. He could feel her heavy breath; she must have felt his loud beating heart underneath his shirt. He was the one to capture her lips with his, making her sigh. They moved together to the rhythm of the slow, sensual song that was still playing. Starting to feel somewhat impatient, her hands started to roam on his back, going from the bottom of his spine to the back of his neck, passing by his waist and brushing his arm. His hands hungrily roamed over her shoulder, crushing her body against him. Yet she didn't protest. He would deepen the kiss and as a response, she opened her mouth wider and placed her tongue on his bottom lip. That movement took him by surprise and he got captured fast enough. Joseph would bring out his, gently, sensually brushing hers, pushing it back into her mouth, where their tongues would be engaged in a sensual duel. Breathless, she broke the kiss, slightly opened her eyes and looked at him.

"Carry me..." she whispered.

"What?" he wasn't sure of what he heard. Their kiss was intoxicating; it left him with some strange, yet delightful impression, as if he couldn't think.

"Carry me..." she whispered to him again. A small smile formed on his lips as he picked her up and walked toward the bed where he carefully put her down. "There's no backing out now... but I don't want to..." she thought to herself as she pulled the sheets to the side. Joseph stayed beside the bed, unable to move, now that he realised that he just couldn't think straight anymore. He's waited so long… She's waited so long…

Turning her face for her eyes to meet his, she sat up, smiled and brought her hands to the top button of her night blouse, slowly undoing it. His jaw dropped open and his breath was deeper. She had seen this sparkle in his eyes before; this sparkle of desire that would take control of every inches of his body. Clarisse looked at him, smiled and brought herself toward Joseph, until the inside of her knees would reach the edge of the bed. There, she lifted her head up to him. He brought his hand to her burning cheek and softly brushed his fingers on her smooth skin, making her shiver.

Could he see that despite her fear, he has such effect on her that her body responds by itself? Could he see that she's trembling, needing a comfort she's been longing for? Asking Joseph to simply put his arms around her, telling her that everything will be alright wouldn't be enough; Clarisse felt she needed more. She lifted her hand but seemed to hesitate for a second. She brought it up again to grab his neck so she could pull him close to her.

"Clarisse," Joseph started saying on an intimate tone Clarisse had never heard before. "you were seen by the people as their ruler. Every person that crossed your path had never known they've just been in contact with the most wonderful woman. Because I know that you are and because I see that, it makes me feel privileged. I've looked at you long enough to see your humanity, Clarisse. You have the biggest heart. And to let me being a part of it is something I would always be grateful for…" She silenced him by bringing him with her in her fall back, which got her lying on the bed with Joseph half on top of her. She'd take great delight in noticing how his body felt against hers.

Clarisse's hands running hungrily over Joseph's back made him sigh in her mouth. By which power this fire was awakened? Both wouldn't know; wouldn't wonder the whys now. It was just about opening up to the other, feeling the teases, the whispers, the cries, the promises one toward the other.

Joseph brought his hand to cup her face and felt her burning cheeks.

"Are you alright?" he softly asked her. Her eyes closed, Clarisse nodded, bringing her mouth to his in an impatient movement. Joseph was surprised by her sudden impatience but didn't care as he had lost all thought for quite a long moment now. She took his hands and put it on the next button of her pyjama shirt, guiding him into the action of undoing it. He got where she would be going and pushed her hand aside to let him continue freely. He undid her button and moved to the other, then the other, then the other… Until he had his hands on both side of the tissue, ready to take it off of her. Breathing deeply and uncontrolled, she said "yes", nodding to amplify her acknowledgement.

Joseph pushed the material aside, revealing her body. Joseph bent down and kissed her fully on the lips.

"Beautiful, Clarisse, beautiful…" he whispered to her. "Hum, may I?"

"Don't be silly Joseph, not the time to…" she didn't have the time to finish that he shut her with a kiss that seemed different than all the others. Clarisse wouldn't know what magic had awakened all of this but she was in pure delight of the events. Joseph moved to kiss her neck, which made her arch her back a little bit and she sent her head backward to give him better access. He explored her body, taking in everything that would make her push herself upward, what makes her sigh. He paused for a second and let Clarisse run her hands on his chest, undoing every button of his pyjama shirt. When he removed the material, Clarisse was astounded; she would never have noticed how in good shape he was. She sat on the bed and kissed his chest. The warm pressure of her lips on his skin sent shivers through his spine. Clarisse moved from his chest to his lips, capturing it with hers, pushing Joseph back so he'd be lying on the bed with Clarisse on top of him.

If it weren't for Clarisse to give him the pleasure she had just given him, he would have pulled away, asking for her forgiveness for putting her in such position; he got carried away. He's not the only one to get carried away so it seems. Sitting atop of him, she looked intensely at him and brought her delicate hands to his pyjama bottom, starting to slide it down but stopped midway to look at the scar on his hip.

"Some lost bullet, a long, long time ago…" he said to her. She bent down her head to place her lips on his skin, making him drop on his back and grin in excitement as physical answer to the warmness of her breath on his skin, the softness of her lips. Joseph sat up, took Clarisse by the shoulders to roll on the bed with her, to rest on top of her. She'd run her hands along his hip until she reached his pant and helped him remove what was left. He daren't remove his slip, wanting her to be certain of her acts. Slightly teasing him, she slowly removed her own pyjama bottom. Joseph's eyes widened as he noticed she wasn't wearing any underwear. His shy smile warmed her heart and made her blush as she realised that no other man had seen her naked. Rupert has but he'd never take the time to capture the beauty, the perfection of her body.

"Oh, Clarisse…" he whispered, moving toward her, feeling her hand on the material he had left on, pulling it away. He was naked in front of her. Joseph was trembling, so was Clarisse. All of this hidden longing and now they finally were where they needed to be. She moved forward a bit, as did Joseph. She started to move toward him again but it was he who closed the gap between them and lied down Clarisse on the bed, where, together, they'd taste each other, asking, answering unanswered words, asking, needing more as time went by until they'd drift away in each other's arms.

VIII


	5. Chapter 5

The hot rays of the sun laid on her bare skin, warming the cool breeze coming from the slightly opened window, waking her up; her heart singing a new melody. Clarisse noticed a man sitting in the bed, at her side, watching her awaking, striking his fingers through her hair and leaning forward to sensually kiss her forehead as a sign of "good morning". The satin sheets all tossed on one side reminded her of what happened last night. The thought made her blush, making Joseph smile.

"I take that as you are having happy thoughts I hope!" He said to her. Clarisse could feel the smile in his voice.

"Oh yes, happy thoughts, definitely…" She answered him, her look drifting away in some dream she had. She thought about her arranged marriage with Rupert; how glad she was that they turned out to be the best of friends and they grew very fond of each other, but yet there was no love. As Queen she had sex with Rupert for Genovia but Clarisse made love with Joseph, for the first time in her life.

She closed her eyes, slowly stretching like she does every morning, as if she were alone. Joseph would simply watch her proceed, a grin on his face when she realised she wasn't alone anymore. Clarisse chuckled a bit before leaning forward toward Joseph, bringing him close to her by putting her arms around him. He brought his hands to cup her face, closing the small distance separating them and kissed his wife tenderly.

Now that she had tasted the blood, Clarisse was too shy to even admit to herself she wanted more. Perhaps at a more appropriate time as she didn't want Joseph to think she would be someone she is not. She pulled away from the embrace and smiled at Joseph.

"We should eat and then go with the schedule." Clarisse said to him, her face rather serious.

"The schedule?" Joseph asked her, unsure if he heard correctly what she said.

"Yes, the schedule. There are attractions; better to take advantage of it and see what the city has to offer as I've heard such beautiful things!" She answered him as she was beginning to get ready for the day. Obviously, Joseph knew that Clarisse had absolutely no idea of how to be around him; how to be intimate perhaps. It would be as if she'd find a way to stay somewhat distant. Would she give herself the chance to let go of her defensive wall? To open up and live her life with her husband at the fullest?

They had breakfast in silence but would exchange a glance once in a while; each time Clarisse would blush, as she wouldn't realise just yet what's going on in her life. She felt a discomfort but it would disappear every time she'd look in his eyes. Outside it would be as if nothing was going on, somehow her eyes would betray her; she's struggling against an inner fight between deciding either to let go, open up and live her life with the man she loves; the man that loves her in return or break both their heart and explain him how it was a mistake…

They walked hand in hand around the city, trying to find their way back to their hotel, as they were exhausted from hiking.

"Do you think we'll live long enough to…" Clarisse paused, not daring to think of the familial tone she's just used with him as if they'd been together forever. She let go of Joseph's hand and as he was about to grab her hand back, Clarisse stopped him and turned around to go toward the policeman. Placing her jacket neatly, she took a deep breath and began to speak to him.

"Guter Nachmittag der Herr. Könnten Sie uns zeigen, wo dieses Hotel ist?" The gentleman answered her and when she turned back facing Joseph, she saw that he had his startled look. Forcing herself not to smile, Clarisse put both her hands firmly on her hips and looked directly at him.

"What, do I seem grossly incompetent to you?" She told him on a teasing tone that got herself to burst into a laughter Joseph had never heard before neither had the Queen of Genovia, Clarisse Renaldi. Coming back to reality and scolding her clothes and directed Joseph toward their hotel, appalled at what she had just done.

II


	6. Chapter 6

Back at their room, Clarisse sat on the couch in front of the foyer and asked Joseph to order tea. Her feet were killing her; it has been ages since she went hiking and yet the doctor says the Queen is in good shape.

"May I?" Joseph asked her as he sat on the couch, looking at her feet, smilling. A grin appeared on her face. She smiled and nodded.

"Why of course you may." was her answer as he took her feet and placed them on his lap. Clarisse was sitting straight as he rubbed her sore feet. He smiled tenderly at her, trying to get her to relax but obviously she was hiding something behind her eyes; he felt it also in the way she was sitting straight on the couch, her muscles tensing everytime he'd reach the side of her foot, unconsciently going from her foot to her ankle.

"Don't you like it?" he asked, suddenly turning his head toward hers and notice that look of hurt that has taken hold of her face.

"Yes, yes I do, Joseph..." she answered him, smiling yet he felt her smile wasn't her natural smile.

"What's going on Clarisse?" he said, almost whispering.

"I'm... I'm tired. It has been a while since I climbed up a mountain..." She smiled again, hoping she would get away with it but of course she knew Joseph wouldn't buy it.

A soft sigh escaped her mouth as she pulled her head back and closed her eyes. A smirk appeared on Joseph's face and he continued to rub Clarisse's feet without asking question concerning what had just happened.

Gently rubbing her foot, he put one of her feet down on his lap and carefully brought his hot hands to her ankle, soflty peeling down hwe sock, until his fingers arrived near her toes and Clarisse would escape a small giggle.

"So Her Majesty, Queen Clarisse is ticklish under the foot... That's interesting." Joseph thought to himself, grinning. He lifted his eyes to see her face and exchanged a warm smile. Clarisse laid her head back again, closed her eyes and a few minutes later fell asleep, driven away by Joseph's touch. He left her there but went to the bed to get a pillow which he placed under her head so she would be more comfortable. Taking a blanket with him at the same time, he covered her foot before bringing it up, brushing Clarisse's body as his hands brought the blanket up, shielding her from any cold breeze that would come in by the slightly opened window. The scene reminded him of that flight to San Francisco, when he pulled that blanket up to cover her, her that was pretending to sleep while she'd enjoy the contact of his hand on her.

The sky above them was blue although there was a bit of clouds. The air around them smelled as if Spring was coming; Clarisse could smell the fresh scent of the roses, the daisies, but most of all, her eyes were captured by a big white place in the meadow and her nose played her tricks as she got closer to see that little flower she had never seen before; Edelweiss. She would have felt like running along the meadow to be a part of all nature's beauty. Clarisse swirled around and was facing Joseph who was carrying the basket in which they had brought food for a picnic in a park they've heard of but now that they've found that place, both new it would be the place for them to be. There was something about it that caught Clarisse's attention and yet she knew she's never been here before.

Arriving to a spot where Clarise had stop, Joseph knelt down and put everything in place so they could enjoy this outdoor lunch. She sat down and looked at him taking care of putting everything at its place. They had lunch in silence but would exchange several glare, once there eyes would lock and they'd get caught in the other's gaze, not willing to look anywhere else. The moment brought them closer, closer one to the other at a point where Joseph reached out his hand to cup Clarisse's cheek but instead of giving into it, she turned her head and blushed deeply. Not wanting to force her, because he was too, after all a bit overwhelmed with everything that has been happening since the last few days, he invited her to rest her head on his lap, saying he has a story to tell her.

"Once upon a time, here, in Slazburg, there was a man named Georg Von Trapp' Captain Von Trapp. He was a retired naval officer. He lived in a villa near the lake with his seven children. Georg Von Trapp was a widower, his wife, Agatha, had passed away a few years earlier. He called Nunberg Abbey to enquire help to look after the children because he had to travel sometimes. Answering his need, they sent a young postulant named Maria Kutschera. She was a very active young lady and it turns out she was befriend with the children after they've tried several to trick her, as any child would do in order not to have any new persons entering their lives. They grew very fond of her and her for him, even the Captain; particularly the Captain. It all happened during a dance... ... They decided to get married because they loved each other deeply and they would form a family."

'This is a nice story, Joseph' Clarisse told him after whipping away the few tears that had rolled down her cheeks. Joseph held her closer to him and kissed her forehead. With a fast movement he bent down to kiss her neck which got her to moan softly, the gesture making her hot suddenly. She looked up at Joseph who already had his eyes on her and she moved forward, closing the gap between them and placed her lips against his while her hand would strike his arm. Coming back to her senses, she pulled away which got Joseph to have a questionning look all over his face; he didn't understand what happened but most of all, why did she suddenly pulled away. Did she not want him?

'Clarisse, what's going on?' he asked her, just he he had done the day before.

"I'm... I'm tired from the hiking again. Perhaps it'll take me some days to get back into shape.' she told him.

'Clarisse, don't...'

'Don't what, Joseph?'

'Don't think I would buy this sort of comment after you do something that after only a few seconds brings you back to your senses and make you stop because you think it's out of character for a Queen to act like a married woman for Lord's sake!' he simply told her, daring to confront her.

She looked back at him, stunned by what she has just heard. Clarisse nodded her head from left to right, closing her eyes to make it go away and opened them again to find Joseph still looking at her directly but his gaze was now tender and he had his hand on her cheek, softly brushing her sking with her finger when he calmly said to her:

'Let me in, Clarisse...'

THE END


End file.
